I'm going to say upfront I haven't the slightest idea where in the world I'm going with this, but then again, I hardly ever do. However, you've now officially been forewarned. Rambling to commence in 3...2...1...
While I have had a number of boyfriends over the years I have actually had an abnormally disproportionate share of first dates. Fair to say ratio here is easily 10:1. I long ago decided as a single mother it would be important to drastically limit not only casual dating but also limit casual-yet-time-consuming friendships. I am happily and loyally committed to and nurturing of my few close relationships; I am simply extremely selective of those people and groups I become closely associated with. Like everyone else in the world I've experienced the perils of not being so selective...and I personally found that path leading to severe disappointment. Do I feel as though those involved with the aforementioned disappointment are inherently bad or evil people? No. This would be stupid, as I was involved, too. Look at me- I am too cute to be evil:
Additionally, I realize the people/groups involved did not make reprehensible decisions that were wholly or even partially responsible for undeserved hurt and pain. I do not feel this way now yet employ these examples anyway because they are typically the starting players in the self-reinforcing cycle of thought a lot of folks-including myself at times- get stuck in after going through a painful experience. The nasty cycle mostly involves placing blame, playing victim and, you know, whining. A lot of whining. If you're stuck in that cycle try donating a bit of your time to a good charity organization or, and I say this with all the love in my heart, try getting the f*ck over it. You'll thank yourself later for cutting what essentially is a self-indulgent pity party short. Shockingly enough, living in the possibility of the present is a hell of a lot more satisfying and fruitful than dwelling on the sad memories from an unchangeable past. This lesson has been a hard one to learn, and I'm still learning everyday. ...So what was the point of this? Damn tangents. Ah, yes. Trusting a precious small few. Moving along...
Love All.
Please do not confuse my limiting close associations with not liking or spending time with many people who are not...er...close associates. Rather understand the distinction between a dear confidante and a fond acquaintance, a distinction not signifying that I love either one less than the other. Love them differently, sure. But not less, not hardly. I am lucky to love so many special people, all in different, beautifully enriching ways.
(Important to note I definitely do not love certain people, but comparatively that list is limited. Off the top of my head: I definitely do not love child molesters, rapists and Bill Maher.)
I just...hate that guy. *shudders*
Almost everyone else I know, though, I honestly love. This natural tendency is more than likely a result of being a southern belle and watching Pollyanna 14,789 times as a kid. I have heard the naysayers mock this way of life. (Mostly the chronically unhappy & icky atheists, also a few friends and family members, too.) But frankly, my dears, I don't give a damn. While trusting few and loving all are paramount in the way I approach life, so is that last part of the Shakespeare quote:
do wrong to none.
Finally, the easy one. Well...at least easy to explain. Whether it be betraying the trust of a special friend by knowingly disclosing a sacred secret or causing a noticeable dent on a car door and opting to flee the parking lot instead of opting to leave a note- no matter how justified you feel you are- knowingly causing harm to someone else ALWAYS comes back to take a chunk out of your ass in the end. Who knows, perhaps all of the blessings and joy in my life have absolutely nothing to do with loving all, trusting few and doing wrong to none, maybe it's all been fate...but something tells me that Shakespeare might just have been on to something.
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